chapter 5
The vision came to an end and I was sitting again in the coffee shop. I then began to realise that the facts behind universal formulae were blocked away from the mind of a man fully aware. And that perhaps consciousness had to be driven to other states like the state of dreaming in order to achieve greater levels of knowledge.
I thought I needed to think over these things that had filled my mind so completely. I farewelled the good people in the café and headed out via the back door. I walked and I walked and time to time I even ran a little. Straightforward I travelled and travelled for aeons. Indefinite, long amounts of time. Then the circle was closed and I arrived back here and I was again pleased by the view of this brightly lit marble hall. This time the person that I was talking with during my previous visit to this mysterious coffee shop seemed quite different - a little older perhaps. The same familiar look was still there banging on the walls of my consciousness. I knew I had to ask a question. I sat down on a chair across the table.
'How can you look so familiar to me', I started my strangest discussion ever. 'Well, it is not so obvious, you see', he replied and continued: 'As you now have to get familiar with our little universe, you have probably come to think about life itself and your relationship with the surrounding world on a bit different basis than you've got accustomed to. Not all is so clear anymore. Things you had built your world-view on now seem to have lost their balance. The paradox of existence is taking over your mind. As I saw you here aeons ago for the first time, I already knew what you are here for.' 'You see...', he began. And I was shocked nearly to death. For I was him, you see.
[--]
I was still sitting quite still by the same table in the darkest corner of the coffee shop. At the same table, yes, but on the opposite side. I was looking straight into my own eyes, as if there was a mirror in front of me. But there was no mirror - only the coffee shop table and - apparently - me on the other side as well. There was a moment of terrifying silence. I was struck even by the realisation that the presence of passing time accompanied with silence - can be an experience that matches and surpasses any feeling of fright that a man goes through in his life. I was him. And I was still me on the opposite side. I was waiting for an answer that I was about to continue, having begun a moment ago by: 'You see...'
No Escape
After these Travels
My Path towards discovering universal Truths
Came to an End
Collapsing seconds of Eternity made me realise:
There was no Escape
Final dawn after the winds of destruction
Show isolated Orbits unoccupied
Wheels that used to spin
Were left to rest
Other ones had always been
Yet another order was set
As these arose from the cold
Infinity of Distance and Time
Lost meaning
Divergence of ever increasing Speed
Did not cease but blew away
Silently the binding and surrounding Chaos
The Ice once melted got frozen again
Expansion and Contraction
Became a matter of Perspective
No Escape
I heard myself talk: 'You are walking around this construction, this creation of madness where you have always been and where you always will be. It is what is left of the universe. You have been here for - how long? Two days? A fortnight? One 'day' you will have been here for a millennium - and then a million years. Time as you perceive it. What would your thoughts be if I told you that your first two thousand years down here actually last for one vibration of an atom? And that the two thousand years after that will actually last even a smaller period of time. That you are caught by the end of everything.'
'The point of your entry may be the beginning of all this - for you. But there is no end. You are the only one who populates this lonely place. Infinitely, my friend, infinitely. I have been here for infinity, as you will be. Slowly driven mad by loneliness and talking to images of yourself in the future and in the past. Slowly driven mad. From this, there is no escape. There has never been. Escape is impossible, because everything that bears any meaning has already ended with a whimper in the surrounding universe outside. Wherever that was.'
I saw myself standing up, having turned completely pale, staggering towards the back door, in panic. My body was in shivers because of the thorough realisation I just had had. I saw myself at the back door staring at me sitting here on this seat. It was obvious that we shared the same realisation, only I could not move, while the preceding instance of me could escape through the door. At exactly the same moment that I saw myself disappear through the back door, the front entrance slammed open and a figure appeared. I turned to see who had entered. I looked with a hint of pity at his widely opened panic-struck eyes as he tried to catch his breath. He had obviously run a long way. A long path. I stared at him and he stared at me. Everyone was looking at each other. I had to think about ice cubes floating about in a glass of water. But... all this happened a very, very long time ago. Indeed, I most dearly welcome you to sit down for your first cup of coffee.
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There really was no Escape.
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